Messing with L
by TheRussianGaaraKid
Summary: Light has come up with a brilliant way to mess with everyone's favorite sweet tooth detective but he's inlisted the help of Misa, Ryuk and Rem. Who knew changing one little thing could be this interesting! oneshot


Anime/Manga: Death Note

Characters: Light, L and Ryuk

Genre: Humor

~ I do NOT own Death Note or the characters

Messing with L

"What do you want Kid, I'm busy" The grotesque looking death god grumbled as he saw Light walk up to him with a mischievous grin on. This did not look like a harmless visit, then again when has it ever been with the messed up kid with a God complex. He saw a hint of red behind the teenager's back knowing he brought the good's, nice fresh apples always brightened the Shinigami's dreary existence.

"That's not very nice especially since I brought this" Light stopped before the red eyed creature before pulling out the ripe apple from behind his back lifting it before him as a prize. He could see from the slight change on the hideous creature's lips that he'd gotten his attention. Good.

Ryuk grabbed the apple as it soared through the air towards him and greedily took a bite out of it. The fruit certainly did have a lot a juice in it he mused as he took yet another bite sobering the sweet taste. Knowing the ridiculous teenager wanted something he quickly finished the treat sighing at the now filling sensation he got in his stomach.

"You look like you enjoyed that" Light stated taking a seat at his desk before taking out a book to read silently, it was a new one that he no doubt had gotten from L. Just looking at the front cover, which was filled with various colorful looking sweets ranging from simple cupcakes to intricate cakes and tarts, Ryuk began to feel a cavity form in his pointed teeth. The teenager looked like he found the book interesting but knowing him he was probably just reading the book because it was a present from L who still suspected he was the infamous murderer Kira.

"Yeah it was good" Ryuk moved from his seat at the edge of the window sill and began to make his way over the seat Light was currently sitting in. well now he knew why he was reading this. Apparently the book had listed ingredients to many of the sweets that insomniac usually snacked on as well as the nutrition values (or lack of it) that each had. The brunette had taken the liberty of jotting down how many of each treat the other had been eating in the book and calculating the sugar intake the other was ingesting. "What are you doing?"

"I assume you'd already caught on from my notes" Light replied airily before finishing his tallying and calculations. Closing the book he carefully put the book back in its place on his crowded bookshelf in the room he was sharing with the famous detective L. Although Light had asked many times before for his own room the elder man denied every one of his requests saying "Frankly I don't trust you. In the small chance you do get your own room there is a fifty percent chance you'll start planning my death, forty percent chance you'll plan another attack on a prisoner and a ten percent chance you'll do something adulterous that you'll regret with Miss Amane."

"A hint?" The death god asked as he followed the teenager to his bed where a package addressed to Misa was sitting there. Smiling the teenager pulled out a pocket knife from seemingly nowhere and began to open the box. Inside the plain cardboard box was a bunch of packaging peanuts and bubble wrap and once they were cleared the item delivered was revealed.

"Care to guess what this is?" Light lifted the bottles filled perfect white cubes and grainy snow like substances. He shook the bottles a bit before the same mischievous smile returned to his face. Ryuk stared at the bottles carefully raising an eyebrow confused as to why the teenager was happy about.

"Sugar, you're smiling because you ordered sugar?" Ryuk shook his head before sweat dropping at the strangeness.

Light frowned a bit at this before putting the bottle back in the box. "It's not just any kind of sugar; this is a special low fat sugar. The company that Misa ordered this from solely makes dietary merchandise and this just happens to have laxatives infused in them."

'So Light has finally lost it and is trying to lose weight in an effort to become the person he wants to be. Great the next thing you know he'll be an anorexic and die too soon, I was just starting to have fun watching these humans.' The Shinigami thought to himself as he leaned on the wall beside his bed.

"So going on a diet is going to help you how?" Ryuk spotted a juicy looking apple by the door in a bag he failed to see before. He quickly floated over to the bag and began to feast on the contents without pausing to look at Light when he replied.

"No you imbecile, I'm not going on a diet. Where would you get such a stupid idea like that from?" Growling the death note holder quickly took a deep breath to try and calm himself down. "I had Misa order these bottles of sugar to slip into Ryuzaki- san's food and drinks."

This made Ryuk look up from his sixth apple and turn to the brilliant young man on the bed. That wasn't a bad idea, well except for the fact that L would probably be expecting him to poison him and so his butler kept an eye on all of the things that entered the kitchen. Looking down at the apples something clicked in the death god's mind making him suspicious. "And I fit into this plan how?"

Grinning a bit the brunette ran a finger through his hair that had gotten quite long after his time in the holding cell. Picking up the bottle once more Light stared into the contents closely before looking back at the beast who was staring at him.

"You will be helping me place the sugar into his food. I know Watari is in charge of making all of the food and would probably see this coming a mile away so I need your help. It shouldn't be that hard since no one can see you and Misa already knows about this so we'll have her helping us out as well"

Thinking about it the shinigami scratched his spiked black hair with his ring clad craws. He knew this would be kind of fun and the brat did get him a bunch of apples but then again this did take effort. Sighing Ryuk nodded before returning back to his apples that were just begging to be eaten.

The Next Day…

"Good morning Yagami- san." The raven haired detective was at the table with Misa placing some sugar cubes into his tea. It took all of Light's concentration and will to stop himself from smiling at the thought the detective had no idea what would be coming. He instead wiped his eyes tiredly before walking over to the coffee maker to pour himself a fresh cup of coffee.

"Morning Ryuzaki, Misa." Light took his seat at the table across L and adjacent to Misa who was making a fuss about not sitting closer to her. The teenager ignored her instead he picked up the newspaper before him and began scanning the paper for anything interesting. He picked up his mug of black coffee and took a sip exhaling happily at the familiar taste running down his throat.

"Is there something pleasant in the news?" The bored voice that no doubt belonged to L echoed which made Light look up at the detective. It seemed as though he hadn't taken a drink of the tea yet only stirred it.

"No, why do you ask?" Light was genuinely confused at the question but decided not to really pay much attention to him as he took yet another sip from the plain white mug.

"You seem to be in a better mood today. Perhaps you and Misa had something 'special' happen last night. I heard quite a bit of noise downstairs but I didn't think it was too important so I didn't bother to check up on it." The man slouching in his seat with his knees brought to his chest stopped his stirring and took a sip of his tea then stopped.

"Gross, you don't think we'd actually do something like that would you? Wait you heard something downstairs? That's strange. I wasn't even downstairs yesterday; I was doing some research in my room all night." The brunette answered as he folded the newspaper and placed it on the table. He then turned to Misa who was blushing at the comment made by the blunt detective.

"Yeah, I was in the kitchen yesterday making my signature Misa Misa shake. It's really yummy but it takes a while to make and I couldn't seem to find the sugar." She frowned a little at the memory of how she went into every cabinet trying to find the sugar she needed only to find nothing. She was too busy reliving yesterday's events that she didn't see Light's warning glance, but L didn't.

"Well you may borrow some of my sugar if you like but be sure not to use too much, you'll lose your figure and end up being even more useless" L smiled as Watari placed a plate with a slice of vanilla cake with some chocolate frosting and a strawberries before him.

'Good lord how much sugar does that thing have?' Ryuk thought from his place on the wall on the other side of the room. He had waited until Watari had gone to bed and the bimbo, Misa, to leave the kitchen before sneaking in and putting the sugar into the highest shelf where Watari seemed to have hidden the bottle of sugar last night. Ryuk had even stayed hours later until dawn had come to watch as the faithful butler began to make the cake he had presented to the detective. The amount of sugar he watched being poured into the batter filled with ingredients for cake and icing was ridiculous to say the least, he was pretty much gagging at the thought of what it would taste like.

"Hey I'm not going to get fat, Misa Misa has a really fast metabolism and I work out. Just to prove it to you I will take some!" Misa proceeded to then reach over and grab some of the sugar cubes before going over to the kitchen to make some of her stupid shake. Light lifted a hand to stop her but it was too late the blonde airhead was already in the kitchen starting her concoction.

Light shot the shinigami a look that showed how much he truly couldn't believe this girl was this stupid. I mean seriously he had gone over the plan at least three times before and she kept saying she knew what it was but now look what she's done. There had to be a limit to her airheaded-ness.

"Looks like she didn't know the plan as well as you said" Ryuk chuckled darkly as he got up to check on the blonde and worn her own death god, Rem. Things could get pretty ugly if Rem, the over protective shinigami she was, found out about Misa's condition later on when she was in the bathroom having a pretty shitty three hours in the toilet (literally and figuratively whichever way you want to think about it).

Light nodded as he sweat dropped at the retreating figure of Ryuk. Turning back to the raccoon eyed detective Light could see the man was starting to realize something was up with his beverage. He was staring at the cup intently before he took another sip and put it down.

"Is there something wrong?" Light put on his best 'I really care' face and stared at L with concerned eyes. He knew he was a good actor and that L would totally eat this up, especially since he hadn't realized Light had been pranking him since he got here.

"No, nothing is wrong, per say Yagami- san" L finished his tea in one last giant gulp before placing the cup to the side. He then picked up the fork beside the cake and dug into the sugary treat getting chocolate frosting on his face and nose. Suddenly feeling nauseous at the sight Light got up and handed the childish detective a napkin before leaving to finish his coffee in the comfort of his room.

"Where are you going now?" Ryuk asked as he followed the brunette up the stairs. His red eyes shone extra bright as he saw Rem yelling at Misa from the opening leading into the kitchen. When he'd told the death god of Misa's "accident" she huffed angrily before storming into the kitchen but before she could explode he decided to escape and met up with his charge.

Light didn't answer merely walking into to his room trying to keep his face emotionless. Sometimes the insomniac could be the most nauseating sight and other times he was adorable even to the straightest of people. In this instance when he's eating he is the farthest thing from cute.

Upon entering the room Light instantly picked up the book he was tallying in and took note on this morning's meal before taking out his laptop and doing his daily "Kira research". Nothing he did was out of the ordinary until he suddenly began to chuckle darkly to himself.

"What the hell is wrong with you kid?" Light smirked before turning his laptop and showing Ryuk an image of a flustered L knocking on the shared bathroom looking extremely flustered. The raven haired detective looked really uncomfortable as he squatted on the ground with his arms around his abdomen and his teeth clenched. "How are you able to see all of this?"

"I placed a wireless plastic camera on one of the lamps by the bathroom. It's virtually undetectable and small enough that no one would notice." Light explained before zooming into L's pained face. He had spent days observing the man's trips to the bathroom and formulated a plan using the data collected to get the detective in enough pain and frustration as possible.

Using his knowledge of metabolism and some shameless internet research Light was able to calculate the time range L would possibly need to use the bathroom. He also took into account the lack of sugar in his calculations and once done he had Misa take an incredibly long shower or whatever the hell she wanted to do in the bathroom. Anyway she would have him waiting a very long time before he could enter, thankfully there was only one bathroom in the building he would use and that was the second floor bathroom. This would be a perfect for Light because he also got Misa to get Rem to flood every other bathroom in the building to further torture the detective.

Smiling at his ingenious plan unfolding the teenager tossed Ryuk an apple before going outside to go check on the detective. He was going to pretend he was going to take a bath by carrying his towel along and a change of clothes. He made his way down the hall taking slow steps until he came upon the detective and held in a smile.

"Ryuzaki- san? What are you doing on the floor?" Light asked before extending a hand out to the sick looking man. He seriously didn't look ok, perhaps he shouldn't have replaced all of the sugar but then again who knew L would have this bad of a reaction.

"Don't feel… good" L grumbled out as his eyes began to water. "Get Watari for me" he replied before falling into himself.

Light almost felt bad about what he did but then realized that L was the trying to stop him from making his ideal world and retracted the feeling. The teenager raced down the stairs to find the notorious butler only to see him placing a couple of sugar cubes into his tea. Before he could take a sip Light called out his name startling him into dropping his tea. Sighing in relief Light quickly explained L's condition upstairs and followed Watari up the stairs silently with a "worried" expression on.

"What is the matter? What ails you? Watari checked for a temperature and checked his pulse before picking up the detective and carrying him to the bed he rarely even used on the other side of our shared room. It took everything in Light not to laugh at the pitiful sight but it was made harder when Ryuk was cackling next to him.

"Watari it hurts" L whined as he continued to hold onto his abdomen as though his life depended on it. Light sighed as he sat on his bed facing the over reacting insomniac, now this was getting annoying.

"Look Watari- san why don't you get Ryuzaki-san some water perhaps that will help him" he calmly stated before feeling a hand grab onto on his dress shirt. It stopped him and he turned around only to see a thoroughly pissed of L laying there on his bed hand still on his stomach.

"What did you do with the sugar?" he growled uncharacteristically low. How the hell did he know? Might as well play the stupid card.

"What are you talking about?" Light asked sounding mildly amused and confused. He really wanted to break character and taunt the sweet tooth whose horrible habit landed him in that state. Maybe he would have except he knew that would only lead to another set of problem.

"I know this has something to do with you" The raven glared at the brunette before something amazing happened. He passed out. Looking up he saw Ryuk chuckling before exiting the room with Rem. 'He couldn't be dead right?' Light quickly felt for a pulse and found a rather strong one.

"I'm sorry Yagami-san; I think Ryuzaki- san needs to rest up. All of the years of his sugar habits have just caught up to him" He explained before tucking the hunched figure in.

Nodding Light left the room and headed straight to the bathroom and knocked three times to signal the coast was clear. Nothing happened so Light knocked three times again only to be met with a load moan from the bathroom.

"Misa are you alright?" he called before hearing a small cry. Shrugging Light went down the stairs to get himself a bottle of water and some snack. At least now he was free to do whatever he wanted without L or Misa breathing down his back. 'Maybe I should switch the sugar more often' Light mused as he leaned comfortable on the couch turning on the television. It sure beat being bored.

**A/N: So this is probably the first time I've uploaded two things in one day! I've been wondering about what would happen if someone switched L's sugar and well this suddenly popped up in my head so I had to write it down. This would have been up hours ago but my computer was being a butt munch and decided to erase most of my story. Anyway I hope you liked this short story and leave a comment because I love hearing from readers. **


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